Skip to main content

Feeling defeated...

Today marks one year since I had my life changing surgery.  While I should have been celebrating all that I have accomplished I'm sitting here beating myself up.  Not because I've lost 100 pounds in the last year but because I only lost 3 pounds in the last 4 months.  I broke down in the doctor's office crying because that was not what I wanted to see.  I wanted to see larger numbers.  I wanted to see 20 pounds.  Not 3!  Dr. V asked me "when was the last time you lost 100 pounds?  When was the last time you ran or walked 6 miles?"  He reminded me that I do have a lot to be proud of.  Am I where I want to be?  No.  Can I get where I want to be?  Yes.  I will get there.  I need to stop beating myself up over this and figure out how to get where I want to be.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Buffet

For lunch today Mary Ellen wanted Chinese or Japanese.  The only place around was a buffet.  I tend to avoid buffets since my surgery simply because I don't eat enough to warrant paying the price for them.  But in order to avoid the drama that I would have to deal with I agreed to it.  They had sushi and that worked for me!  So as I'm sitting there slowly eating my 5 pieces of sushi I can see everyone filling their plates at the buffet bars.  Some of these plates were heaping.  Some people had 2 plates.  I was seeing people go back 3 and 4 times.  I was thinking to myself "wow, how can they do that?'  Then I realized, that was me.  Yes, that was me.  I use to love buffets.  It was nothing for me to eat 4 or 5 plates full of food.  I'd eat until I was sick and then eat some more.  I had to change my mind on how much I could eat.  Not only did surgery help me do this but I had to change my mind to do this. ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Addiction...

I want to get back to my blog because, well, I've not written anything in well over a year. Writing helps me and I just need to get back to it. In that year I have put on some of my weight. How much...oh, like 35 pounds! Some of that is from my hormonal change after a hysterectomy. Some of that is stress. But most of that is my addiction. My name is Shannon and I'm addicted to food. Yes, addicted to food. It is my drug of choice. I'm not addicted to healthy foods. I'm addicted to sweets to the point that I have days that I eat nothing but sweets. I have tried several medications to help me but none have helped so far. I am going to be working on myself again and working to overcome this addiction. It is so hard but I can do it.
Post a Comment
Read more

Getting my mind right...

Well, it has been a little over 2 years since surgery. I was down about 120 lbs. I regained about 20 lbs. I hit a number on the scale that I said I would never see again.  How did I do that? I went back to old habits. Sweets, bread and high fat & calorie foods. I cried in the doctor's office when he looked at my weight. He didn't scold me. He just told me that I have to get my mind right and get back on track.   I pretty much beat myself up over this. I stressed and I cried. I was so disappointed in myself. Here I was scrutinizing every morsle of food my husband was eating while I sat back and ate the same, if not worse, foods.   Last week I was scrolling through Facebook and found an article at  bariatriceating.com .  This article said a few things that I needed to hear.  1. Just a little of what made me fat before will make me fat again.  2. I don't need the pasta and bread so leave it out of my diet. 3. Starbucks needs to be off my diet. 4. Prot...
Post a Comment
Read more