Tomorrow I go for my 2 year follow up from surgery. I really thought about cancelling my appointment because I'm mad at myself for not being where I want to be. Not only am I not there but I have also gained about 10 pounds. I am hoping tomorrow's appointment will help me move in the right direction and get to my goal weight.
For lunch today Mary Ellen wanted Chinese or Japanese. The only place around was a buffet. I tend to avoid buffets since my surgery simply because I don't eat enough to warrant paying the price for them. But in order to avoid the drama that I would have to deal with I agreed to it. They had sushi and that worked for me! So as I'm sitting there slowly eating my 5 pieces of sushi I can see everyone filling their plates at the buffet bars. Some of these plates were heaping. Some people had 2 plates. I was seeing people go back 3 and 4 times. I was thinking to myself "wow, how can they do that?' Then I realized, that was me. Yes, that was me. I use to love buffets. It was nothing for me to eat 4 or 5 plates full of food. I'd eat until I was sick and then eat some more. I had to change my mind on how much I could eat. Not only did surgery help me do this but I had to change my mind to do this. ...
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